Pour yourself a pint of Bass and whip out that Grey Poupon, ’cause it’s time for an all-British, all-luxury future car round-up! In fact, in honour of these English saloons, we’ll be using the British spelling wherever applicable!
First up: the all-new Jaguar XJ. Now, the current XJ has been around since 2003, more than long enough for a new model; however, considering the ’03-’09 version looked about as similar to the 1994-2002 version as a jaguar does to a leopard (relevant humor! Yay!), it’s fair to say anyone holding their breath for a new-looking XJ has long since asphyxiated.
However, with Jaguar busting out a full-court-press of stylish, inventive new models capable of clawing (hah hah!) their way to the top of the segment, it’s time for a fresh take on the company’s full-size sedan. Jaguar will be officially unveiling their new S-class and 7-series fighter on July 9th, but until then, they’ve given us a “preview” image to whet our appetites.
Test mules have also been spotted roaming about. Below, a fairly finished-looking XJ tries to camouflage itself with a BMW-like psychedelic body coating. (I would have just assumed it was an attempt by Jag to try and inspire fond ’60s memories in Jaguar fans, but no, they even stuck on a fake BMW grill.)
According to Britain’s CAR Magazine, the upcoming XJ will be the lightest car in its class, due to extensive use of aluminium. Engine choices Stateside will be limited to a 5.0-litre 380-hp V8 or a 503-hp supercharged version of the same; Europeans also get diesel and V6 choices. A stylish, modern interior (like Bang & Olufsen modern, not IKEA modern) will come with a bunch of cool electronics, such as dual-display monitors (letting driver and passenger see different things on the same screen, which is pretty cool shit), digital instrument panel displays and – I swear, we’re not making this up – “improved electrical reliability.” Wow, this IS a new chapter for Jaguar!
(CAR’s drafted a couple artist’s conceptions of the new car, which can be seen below.)
Next up in our English revue (I think that’s actually French, but whatever. American arrogance rules!) comes another replacement for a model that’s been around since Larry King was riding to school on a woolly mammoth – the Bentley Arnage. First introduced in 1998, the Arnage continued Bentley’s then-tradition of obese luxury cars – but like a fat man with diarrhea, it could sure move fast when it needed to, thanks to its 4.4-litre 350-horsepower twin-turbo BMW V8. (Yes, back in 1998, you needed two turbos to get 350 horses out of a V8.)
But then BMW and Volkswagen started brawling over Rolls-Royce and Bentley, and when the dust settled and VW had snagged the alphabetically (and pretty much every other way) superior brand, BMW retaliated by cutting off their fancy new engines. So VW stuffed Bentley’s old six-and-three-quarter-litre V8 into the cars. And when we say old, we mean old; the engine traces its basic structure to a General Motors V8 from the 1950s, and was first used to power a Bentley in 1959.
Since then, the Arnage has trucked along mostly unchanged; a power boost here, some added legroom there, a new transmission for fun. In 2005, Bentley introduced its first all-new car developed under Volkswagen, the Continental GT; despite sharing a platform with the $90,000 VW Phaeton, it proved a massive success, becoming the ride of choice among royalty and rappers alike. Its spin-offs, the Continental Sedan and GTC convertible, only served to further overshadow the slower, pricier, and uglier Arnage.
But after over a decade on the market, the Arnage is finally riding off into the sunset (apparently it’s going to Dublin), paving the way for what Bentley is describing as the “all-new Grand Bentley.” The image below is the only hint Bentley’s giving of what the new car will look like, but given the (admittedly veiled) image, we can probably expect evolutionary styling – think a sleeker-looking Arnage.
Powertrain details haven’t been made available, but expect either a 600+ horsepower version of the Continental’s twin-turbo W12 or a souped-up version of the old 6.75-litre V8 again making 600 or more horses. (At this rate, the 6.75 V8 is on track to become the automotive engine version of the B-52 bomber.) Pricing will probably be somewhere between $250,000 and $300,000, with options to include anything you can goddamn think of, because it’s a Bentley. They made station wagon versions of the Arnage.
The new model may or may not actually called the “Grand Bentley” when it goes on sale either next year or the year after that (isn’t it wonderful when nobody knows anything?); let’s hope it’s called something else, because I’m not ready to deal with trying to figure out whether the full name would be the “Bentley Grand Bentley” or just the “Grand Bentley.”
Finally, let’s take a look at the all-new Aston Martin Rapide, caught for the first time without camouflage this week in the UK by a sharp-eyed CAR Magazine reader named Simon Gregg (and man, are his Google hits spiking). While the car is supposed to be officially revealed this fall at the Frankfurt Auto Show, one was driving around in the nude on public roads for some reason.
Then again, I don’t think any of us really have a problem with such a beauty going around in the buff, do we? (At least, that’s what I keep telling Jessica Biel when I see her. Which is rarely.) When it comes to styling, Aston’s been knocking it out of the park like Barry Bonds on the ball-shrinking juice lately, and the Rapide manages to pull off four doors without looking awkward or staid. (Okay, the car’s tail looks a little…elevated in the picture below, but maybe it’s just excited. Or aroused.)
The Rapide should go on sale early next year, equipped with the 470-horsepower 6.0-litre (okay, that’s getting old) V12 found in the DB9. Hopefully, an “S” model with the DBS’s 510-horsepower V12 (and Daniel Craig looks) will be along soon after. Expect to pay around $175,000 for your Rapide – more than the competing Porsche Panamera Turbo, but hopefully less than the Mercedes-Benz S65 AMG.